Sooo, as if the waiting could be any more excruciating. There is a possibility of a mail strike for Canada post soon. Really? We're still waiting to hear anything from our refrences regarding the adoption papers, and now, it may take even LONGER to get it out to people. No one has even received the stuff yet! it's been a month since they told me they were sending it out. really? REALLY? Sooo, if by some miracle it gets out to people this week, they fill it out, and send it back within another week and then what? it takes three months to get back to CAS? I hate this. i wish I could go pick it all up from people an dhad deliver it to CAS myself!
I have dreams nightly! I talk to friends about how fun it will be to shop for little girl clothes, things, toys, etc. Even the idea of strollers and diapers and night time cuddles, afternoon naps are soooo exciting! You forget how much the little things mean to you whhen the kids are too big for them now. One son just turned 13 this past weekend, another turning 16 this coming weekend! He's even celebrating his birthday with a black belt! Saturday is testing and ceremony day! He's so excited, an nervous. 8 years of hard work and he's finally getting his black belt. Would have had it last year if Ontario allowed 15 year olds to get black belts but here in Ontario, they have to be 16 to receive a black belt in karate.
Sigh, I wish there was a way to fast track all this red tape and paperwork. I know there's not but still, wishes right?
Monday 30 May 2011
Friday 27 May 2011
Here we go again
Well, today is a P.A. day. A mandatory day off from school to allow teachers and staff to get meetings done, work on reports and get workshops going. The kids are all home. All of them, Extra's here for daycare because, well, ADULTS don't have the day off so my house will be full today!
It is also my son's 13th Birthday! Happy Birthday Alex, I love you very much!. So officially, I now have TWO teenagers! Tow, Two teens. sigh. I'm old. very old. When did 37 get old? Oh, yeah, today.
Not a tonne of time for talk today so I'll just sign off and if I'm not back in a week you know it's because the P.A. day did me in! Wish me luck!
It is also my son's 13th Birthday! Happy Birthday Alex, I love you very much!. So officially, I now have TWO teenagers! Tow, Two teens. sigh. I'm old. very old. When did 37 get old? Oh, yeah, today.
Not a tonne of time for talk today so I'll just sign off and if I'm not back in a week you know it's because the P.A. day did me in! Wish me luck!
Tuesday 24 May 2011
Don't feel like it.
This past Monday was Victoria day for those of you that are not Canadians. These holiday Monday's always mess me up! I'm totally off my schedule and feel like I need to go to bed early just to get sorted out lol. I'm supposed to go to Aerobics tonight but I think instead, I'm going to play hookey and curl up on the couch! Ug.
Daycare threw me off today too lol, The weather was not co-operating too well so no outside time butthey still seemed to enjoy themselves so all is good there. Just as well, my foot is flaring up today. I have Plantar Fascitis in my right foot. Painfull as all hell, let me tell you, and I've given birth to four kids! If I sit still for longer than five minutes it seizes up today and is crazy sore! Just ordered another pair of shoes that I can wear indoors all the time. We have hardwood and ceramic throughout my main floor and i was told several times that going barefoot all the time ( I'm never in socks or slippers) is just aggravating the problem. A couple months ago I got a pair of sandals that are supposed to correct and easy the problem and pain....they actually work, soooo, I've been waiting for them to go on sale (crazy expensive since I normally dont spend more than $20 on a pair of shoes for myself) and yesterday they DID go on sale! Wooo! Sooo, I ordered a pair for indoor wear. I will FORCE myself to wear them and hopefully that will start to make it a bit better.
Sigh, Still no adoption news to speak of. Our second son is turning 13 this friday, Gawd i feel old. BUT another week after that I will feel ancient because our oldest is turning 16! UGGG
This weekend, I am told, we are going to the drive-in to see Pirates of the Caribbean! Should be good, the other ones weer awesome and they boys loved them! I WILL be taking half a dozen other kids with us but should STILL be good. We've gotten to the point witht he kids that we've stated either a big gift...or...a big party. Not both. Four kids, big money. Ug again. Most of the time, they choose the big gift, electronics, games, bike, electric scooter (like this year with the 13 year old) Xbox live ect, you get the point. Well, this year, our soon to be teen wanted the scooter, then told me at the last minute that he invited not the normal 2 friends for a sleepover but five!! I was not thrilled but I can't ahve kids expecting to go to a party and be told at the last minute that they are not invited...Alex got a talking to and we crunched the budget! Thank God the drive-in only charges $2 for kids 12 and under. Only three of them are 13! lol, I can still get away with the cheap price for the other ones.
I don't want to be the mean mom but MAN, birthdays get more expensive every year. Gone are the days when we could impress them with a big toy form the bargain stores! They want the tiny, re-chargable things now. Ipod's, PSP's, Cell's etc. Triple ug.
Yup, NOT going to aerobics tonight.
Daycare threw me off today too lol, The weather was not co-operating too well so no outside time butthey still seemed to enjoy themselves so all is good there. Just as well, my foot is flaring up today. I have Plantar Fascitis in my right foot. Painfull as all hell, let me tell you, and I've given birth to four kids! If I sit still for longer than five minutes it seizes up today and is crazy sore! Just ordered another pair of shoes that I can wear indoors all the time. We have hardwood and ceramic throughout my main floor and i was told several times that going barefoot all the time ( I'm never in socks or slippers) is just aggravating the problem. A couple months ago I got a pair of sandals that are supposed to correct and easy the problem and pain....they actually work, soooo, I've been waiting for them to go on sale (crazy expensive since I normally dont spend more than $20 on a pair of shoes for myself) and yesterday they DID go on sale! Wooo! Sooo, I ordered a pair for indoor wear. I will FORCE myself to wear them and hopefully that will start to make it a bit better.
Sigh, Still no adoption news to speak of. Our second son is turning 13 this friday, Gawd i feel old. BUT another week after that I will feel ancient because our oldest is turning 16! UGGG
This weekend, I am told, we are going to the drive-in to see Pirates of the Caribbean! Should be good, the other ones weer awesome and they boys loved them! I WILL be taking half a dozen other kids with us but should STILL be good. We've gotten to the point witht he kids that we've stated either a big gift...or...a big party. Not both. Four kids, big money. Ug again. Most of the time, they choose the big gift, electronics, games, bike, electric scooter (like this year with the 13 year old) Xbox live ect, you get the point. Well, this year, our soon to be teen wanted the scooter, then told me at the last minute that he invited not the normal 2 friends for a sleepover but five!! I was not thrilled but I can't ahve kids expecting to go to a party and be told at the last minute that they are not invited...Alex got a talking to and we crunched the budget! Thank God the drive-in only charges $2 for kids 12 and under. Only three of them are 13! lol, I can still get away with the cheap price for the other ones.
I don't want to be the mean mom but MAN, birthdays get more expensive every year. Gone are the days when we could impress them with a big toy form the bargain stores! They want the tiny, re-chargable things now. Ipod's, PSP's, Cell's etc. Triple ug.
Yup, NOT going to aerobics tonight.
Saturday 21 May 2011
End of the world??????
Well, We're still here! Unlike many of my friends and aquaintenaces, I did NOT have any apocolyptic dreams or premonitions. In fact, I got nada, zilch, nothing, not even a blip on the freaky scale. Hmmm.I have to admit. After all the hoopla over 1999/2000 millenium stuff 11 years ago I kind of gave up on all that stuff. It'll happen when it happens and I sincerely doubt it will be for a very long time. After all, I still haven't seen the last Twilight film yet!
Wednesday 18 May 2011
A new day
Another day, still nothing. None of our refrences have received anything yet. I realize that it's snail mail and that it will all take time but the process is just killing me! I keep having dreams at night, some good, some not so good. For the most part, the dreams are centering around the lack of movement in our case and the possibility tht we keep "missing out" on getting her. I keep picturing her, what she may look like, what her little personality would be like. Will she take to us quickly or will it be a gradual aceptance? Will she lean more towards one of us than the other? How will the boys react to having her here full time? How will Kameron REALLY feel about not being the baby anymore? Arrrggggg. I want this so bad it hurts, LITERALLY hurts! I have a pain in my chest where my heart is, aching.
I have heard firsthand that the process can take years! YEARS! One friend told me that an aquaintance of theirs JUST finally got the child they'd been waiting for for a couple years! I'm happy for them, I really am but the thought of feeling this for that long is scary!
When I was young, My mom made me a quilt. She used to paint on fabric and this quilt had blocks of white fabric with painted dolls from around the world on it. i loved that quilt and always thought that one day I'd have it for my daughter. Well, it sat, in storage because we never had that little girl. I asked my mom for the quilt not long ago. I had her room all pictured in my mind. Not the traditional Pink and Purple, the normal favorite of little girls everywhere, I see a very soft blue-gray on the walls. I want to hand paint some thin branches loaded with cherry blossoms. I want to adhere some small jewels to the center of some of the blossoms so the light catches them and sparkles around the room. I want the curtains to be light and gauzy. White with a top layer of Royal blue. I want to do an upholstered headboard. Still not sure if I will do a floral with blossoms similar to the ones on the walls or something with a little glamour!
Funny, I have all this planned out and most likely, she'll want a pink and purple princess room. Whatever makes her happy.
It's not raining yet today, maybe we'll get outside after show and tell?
I have heard firsthand that the process can take years! YEARS! One friend told me that an aquaintance of theirs JUST finally got the child they'd been waiting for for a couple years! I'm happy for them, I really am but the thought of feeling this for that long is scary!
When I was young, My mom made me a quilt. She used to paint on fabric and this quilt had blocks of white fabric with painted dolls from around the world on it. i loved that quilt and always thought that one day I'd have it for my daughter. Well, it sat, in storage because we never had that little girl. I asked my mom for the quilt not long ago. I had her room all pictured in my mind. Not the traditional Pink and Purple, the normal favorite of little girls everywhere, I see a very soft blue-gray on the walls. I want to hand paint some thin branches loaded with cherry blossoms. I want to adhere some small jewels to the center of some of the blossoms so the light catches them and sparkles around the room. I want the curtains to be light and gauzy. White with a top layer of Royal blue. I want to do an upholstered headboard. Still not sure if I will do a floral with blossoms similar to the ones on the walls or something with a little glamour!
Funny, I have all this planned out and most likely, she'll want a pink and purple princess room. Whatever makes her happy.
It's not raining yet today, maybe we'll get outside after show and tell?
Tuesday 17 May 2011
Mother nature's wheel of wonder!!!!
Sigh, no surprise here, it's going to be another rainy day. I'm totally on board with the whole :feeding the flowers and getting the grass green" thing, but, running a daycare with very active preschoolers can be a little exhausting without some outdoor play time. Yesterday was a perticularly challenging day with several "REALLY? That's what you decided was best to do?" moments. sigh. I'm going to look at it as all preparation for our little one coming. Kameron, our youngest, will be seven in October. There are still the occasional "what were you thinking" times but for the most part, he's pretty good about thinking things through and will even reason with you to get his point accross!
When I first started doiing daycare it was a fluke thing. A friend had decided to close the doors on HER daycare and asked, since I was HOME doing nothing but raising two kids, if I would take some of her part-timers. I thought about it and decided that it couldn't hurt, and after all, these two were older girls that hardly needed care at all! It was fine at first. The girls were great, came in after school, did their homework, had a snack, got picked up, day done. Then the early mornings started. 5:45 to be exact. It was only a couple times a week but MAN that is EARLY when you've just been up with a baby.
After that we moved to a bigger place because within a year of Alex's first birthday we had Jared. At the new place, Pat and I talked about it and I listed ads to try to get a few more kids to look after on a more full-time basis. I managed to get responses fairly quickly which surprised me. Having never needed daycare I had no idea that it was so difficult to FIND daycare, especially good daycare at a good rate. Well, let's jsut say snowball effect!
8 years later I feel like the old woman in a shoe. I've had good kids and, well, not so good kids. I've had more than my share of difficult parents. I've had two incidents of me and parent not meshing and that relationship went south fast. I've had people take serious advantage of me, I've had amazing appreciation. I have some kids, even right now, that I don't kow how I am going to let go of at all when the time comes! lol.
I have a couple that have been with me long enough to be now looking after the siblings. It's wonderful when you can get that kind of relationship with families.
See, it's not all bad, I complain but there are many kids and many parents that really are a part of my life forever.
I am looking forward to the time when I can just have ME time. I want to finish one of my books! I want to send it out to be published, rejection or acceptance. I just want to try! Sure, my little heart will be completely broken if I get a rejection letter but least I will have finished ONE of them instead of having four books on the go with none of them past the 12th chapter. lol sigh.
I am hoping that the move will be life changing. I know that's a tad dramatic but it's how I feel. I want to be able to get up in the morning, make sure the boys get off to school ok, get myslef a nice big cuppa coffee, and spend the day with my little girl. We'll see what happens. I am not ruling daycare out completely, I will still have one little one that will come play with us but she's more like family anyway so it's not a big deal. Plus, she will hopefully be close in age to our daughter so fingers crossed, they like each other and become good friends.
For now, I am looking out the window, at the very grey sky, knowing that at any minute it's going to be raining again. That wind has not let up either, I hear it whistling and screaming out there. What happend to April showers bring may flowers??? I think Mother Nature might be slightly menopausal because she seems to have gotten it backwards this year.
When I first started doiing daycare it was a fluke thing. A friend had decided to close the doors on HER daycare and asked, since I was HOME doing nothing but raising two kids, if I would take some of her part-timers. I thought about it and decided that it couldn't hurt, and after all, these two were older girls that hardly needed care at all! It was fine at first. The girls were great, came in after school, did their homework, had a snack, got picked up, day done. Then the early mornings started. 5:45 to be exact. It was only a couple times a week but MAN that is EARLY when you've just been up with a baby.
After that we moved to a bigger place because within a year of Alex's first birthday we had Jared. At the new place, Pat and I talked about it and I listed ads to try to get a few more kids to look after on a more full-time basis. I managed to get responses fairly quickly which surprised me. Having never needed daycare I had no idea that it was so difficult to FIND daycare, especially good daycare at a good rate. Well, let's jsut say snowball effect!
8 years later I feel like the old woman in a shoe. I've had good kids and, well, not so good kids. I've had more than my share of difficult parents. I've had two incidents of me and parent not meshing and that relationship went south fast. I've had people take serious advantage of me, I've had amazing appreciation. I have some kids, even right now, that I don't kow how I am going to let go of at all when the time comes! lol.
I have a couple that have been with me long enough to be now looking after the siblings. It's wonderful when you can get that kind of relationship with families.
See, it's not all bad, I complain but there are many kids and many parents that really are a part of my life forever.
I am looking forward to the time when I can just have ME time. I want to finish one of my books! I want to send it out to be published, rejection or acceptance. I just want to try! Sure, my little heart will be completely broken if I get a rejection letter but least I will have finished ONE of them instead of having four books on the go with none of them past the 12th chapter. lol sigh.
I am hoping that the move will be life changing. I know that's a tad dramatic but it's how I feel. I want to be able to get up in the morning, make sure the boys get off to school ok, get myslef a nice big cuppa coffee, and spend the day with my little girl. We'll see what happens. I am not ruling daycare out completely, I will still have one little one that will come play with us but she's more like family anyway so it's not a big deal. Plus, she will hopefully be close in age to our daughter so fingers crossed, they like each other and become good friends.
For now, I am looking out the window, at the very grey sky, knowing that at any minute it's going to be raining again. That wind has not let up either, I hear it whistling and screaming out there. What happend to April showers bring may flowers??? I think Mother Nature might be slightly menopausal because she seems to have gotten it backwards this year.
Monday 16 May 2011
Backlog
Several days ago, when I started this blog, I had posted a nice long letter about myself and my family and our new journey. We are in the process of adoption. I had explained all about how our system works and what we were going through and then....the blogger shut down and I LOST everything. So, here I am, starting fresh again. I will go into a few details about the process itself but mostly, my postes will be about my family, our journey with the adoption, the adjustments we may have to make, our feelings on it and just everyday Mom stuff!
My family and I live in Eastern Ontario, Kingston to be exact. I grew up a Military brat and moved around quite a bit. Sure, I experiences a lot in my life and saw many new places and met many new people. Heck, I was lucky enough to start my life off in Europe! We moved to Canada when I was a baby and lived in a couple different provinces. Our last posting happened when I was 13. We moved here. Now, I do LIKE living in Kingston, it's an amazing Historical city full of culture, museums, etc. It's a very OLD city, in more ways than one. We are in a constant state of construction for one, two? Well, we have two ways to get to town (I currrently reside in Kingston east, kind of just outside the main part of town) We go over the causeway through downtown, which is usually under construction or in a state of repair, or, we go on the 401, the major highway the runs parallel to the city, which, right now, is under construction as well. They are expanding the highway to three lanes instead of two both ways. Grrr, Don't even get me started on that headache.
Anyway, My father decided to retire from the military when I was 18. He got out, we bought a house not far from where I live now with MY family and we have been here ever since. I moved around so much as a child that I NEVER wanted to change cities and start over again!
My husband patrick and I have been together for 17 years now. We've lived in several places but always here in Kingston. We have four amazing sons ranging in age from 16 (as of next month) to 6.
For as long as i can remember, I wanted to have a little girl of my own. Hey, we tried! Four times, but it was not in the cards for us to have a daughter by birth. We love our kids but always felt that we would have really done well with a little girl.
We're not rich but we do well. My husband works at a tire plant and has been there for over 20 years. I run a full time daycare out of my house. I've been doing this for over 10 years. A long time for daycare. I know some people do it as a career, well, as much as I love kids, I'm not going career. It is tiring, exhausting actually. Emotionally draining. It tries your patience and pushes your limits. It has been a very rewarding job though. I has allowed me to be home for my kids. I don't have to dress up for work and occasionally "my boss" will let me have pyjama days! lol.
We have a nice house in a good neighborhood and we worked very hard for everything we have. My business runs out of my fully finished basement so yes, sometimes I feel like I'm stuck in a dungeon.
I need change, we all do.
A while back, Pat and I joked about one day being able to afford to adopt a baby from China. We have friends taht did it twice and they are all so happy. We know firsthand how much it cost them but what wonderful rewards they received in those girls. It was a little pipe dream for us. I mean, with four of our own kids, trying to find that kind of money was going to be next to impossible!
Here in Canada, there a a few ways that a qualifying family or couple can adopt. One, Private international adoption, which is what our friends did. Adoption through an agency and working with them to find kids overseas. It's not cheap, in fact it can run you upwards of 20-25 thousand or more, depending on the location, the time, the agency and the fees.
Second, you can adopt privately within Canada through an agency as well. You still pay quite a bit but most times you get paired up with a willing birth mother and go through the process together. The gestation, birth etc. If you're one of the lucky ones to connect with a borth mother and get your beautiful baby that is. Pat and i wanted a girl and although we did consider this option, we didn't want to take the chance the we would not get our daughter. Not that another son would not be great! Don't get me wrong, we just really want a little girl.
Option three is adoption through government funded agencies, like our Local Children's Aid Society. They are Non-profit, so, generally, there are little or no costs to the adoptive families. Now, they are VERY particular on who they let adopt! Whew! So far we are just in the waiting period between refrence checks and homestudy and it has been a trek to get here let me tell you! We both had to get criminal background checks, medical tests and checks, we had to provide a list of family and business refrences, be able to prove our income as to be able to provide for her. When Pat and I had Our first son back in 95' I was only 21. No one asked me what my background was, or wha tthe family medical history way or if I could give this child a good future and stable environment to live in, let alone a home! No one cared if all my medical info was up to date or if I knew how to look after a child or not. Pat and I not only have to prove our worth but also take a course on parenting a child! YEs, parents of four great kids, educated and experienced, have to take a course on how to care for a child in order to adopt one. This program is called P.R.I.D.E. and it focuses on dealing with the emotional issues that could come up with raising an adopted child.
We have chosen to work with Children's Aid to adopt. Yes, to be honest, cost was a factor, but also, we were not really looking to have a newborn baby. At 37 I am past that point where my internal clock ticks for a bun in the oven. I am not really yearning to the 2 a.m. feedings. We would really love to have a little one but closer to between the ages of 1 and 4. There are so many little ones that are either removed from the home due to domestic problems or drug related or just incimpetance. It's unfortunate and non of us want to think about it but it happens, much more than we want to admit. Those children need homes jsut as much at the beautiful new babies that are so covetted. Our youngest son told us that he was happy to have a sister as long as she was a little sister and not a big sister. In other words, he wants to be the BIG brother. lol. so that put us at about 4 as our top number.
We have completed all our paperwork, seen our doctor, had our criminal checks done, accumulated our refrences, submitted all our information for approval and now, we wait. we wait until all our Refrences return their information and then, hopefully, our homestudy will begin. Another bump in our adoption highway. Well, the homestudy is a series of home visits and interviews with us, our sons and our family. The social worker will come to our home, talk with us and the kids to try to get to know us. They will check out the house, the sleeping arrangements, where we will put her, how she will be accepted. etc. I am not too worried about the homestudy, I know we are a good family and have plenty of room for her and plenty of love as well.
The one thing that worries me is our latest decision. we have decided to leave Kingston. Not necessarily go far, in fact, it will only be about 10 minutes outside city limits. It will be closer to pat's work and we really would love to have a nice , big, country property. Acreage is what we're looking for. Now, there was a bump in that sideroad too. We were informed that we can't move while the process in going on due to the fact that the town we wish to move to is just outside of the Kingston Juristiction. If we want to move now, we have to stop the process, move, then start again with the next juristiction over. We've come so far now that I really don't want to start over, it would be heartbreaking! so, we put our move on hold...for now. It's not out, just postponed till the homestudy process is complete. We'll see what they say about that later.
So now, we sait. Wait and hope that all will go well and time will pass quickly.
Bye for now blogland!
My family and I live in Eastern Ontario, Kingston to be exact. I grew up a Military brat and moved around quite a bit. Sure, I experiences a lot in my life and saw many new places and met many new people. Heck, I was lucky enough to start my life off in Europe! We moved to Canada when I was a baby and lived in a couple different provinces. Our last posting happened when I was 13. We moved here. Now, I do LIKE living in Kingston, it's an amazing Historical city full of culture, museums, etc. It's a very OLD city, in more ways than one. We are in a constant state of construction for one, two? Well, we have two ways to get to town (I currrently reside in Kingston east, kind of just outside the main part of town) We go over the causeway through downtown, which is usually under construction or in a state of repair, or, we go on the 401, the major highway the runs parallel to the city, which, right now, is under construction as well. They are expanding the highway to three lanes instead of two both ways. Grrr, Don't even get me started on that headache.
Anyway, My father decided to retire from the military when I was 18. He got out, we bought a house not far from where I live now with MY family and we have been here ever since. I moved around so much as a child that I NEVER wanted to change cities and start over again!
My husband patrick and I have been together for 17 years now. We've lived in several places but always here in Kingston. We have four amazing sons ranging in age from 16 (as of next month) to 6.
For as long as i can remember, I wanted to have a little girl of my own. Hey, we tried! Four times, but it was not in the cards for us to have a daughter by birth. We love our kids but always felt that we would have really done well with a little girl.
We're not rich but we do well. My husband works at a tire plant and has been there for over 20 years. I run a full time daycare out of my house. I've been doing this for over 10 years. A long time for daycare. I know some people do it as a career, well, as much as I love kids, I'm not going career. It is tiring, exhausting actually. Emotionally draining. It tries your patience and pushes your limits. It has been a very rewarding job though. I has allowed me to be home for my kids. I don't have to dress up for work and occasionally "my boss" will let me have pyjama days! lol.
We have a nice house in a good neighborhood and we worked very hard for everything we have. My business runs out of my fully finished basement so yes, sometimes I feel like I'm stuck in a dungeon.
I need change, we all do.
A while back, Pat and I joked about one day being able to afford to adopt a baby from China. We have friends taht did it twice and they are all so happy. We know firsthand how much it cost them but what wonderful rewards they received in those girls. It was a little pipe dream for us. I mean, with four of our own kids, trying to find that kind of money was going to be next to impossible!
Here in Canada, there a a few ways that a qualifying family or couple can adopt. One, Private international adoption, which is what our friends did. Adoption through an agency and working with them to find kids overseas. It's not cheap, in fact it can run you upwards of 20-25 thousand or more, depending on the location, the time, the agency and the fees.
Second, you can adopt privately within Canada through an agency as well. You still pay quite a bit but most times you get paired up with a willing birth mother and go through the process together. The gestation, birth etc. If you're one of the lucky ones to connect with a borth mother and get your beautiful baby that is. Pat and i wanted a girl and although we did consider this option, we didn't want to take the chance the we would not get our daughter. Not that another son would not be great! Don't get me wrong, we just really want a little girl.
Option three is adoption through government funded agencies, like our Local Children's Aid Society. They are Non-profit, so, generally, there are little or no costs to the adoptive families. Now, they are VERY particular on who they let adopt! Whew! So far we are just in the waiting period between refrence checks and homestudy and it has been a trek to get here let me tell you! We both had to get criminal background checks, medical tests and checks, we had to provide a list of family and business refrences, be able to prove our income as to be able to provide for her. When Pat and I had Our first son back in 95' I was only 21. No one asked me what my background was, or wha tthe family medical history way or if I could give this child a good future and stable environment to live in, let alone a home! No one cared if all my medical info was up to date or if I knew how to look after a child or not. Pat and I not only have to prove our worth but also take a course on parenting a child! YEs, parents of four great kids, educated and experienced, have to take a course on how to care for a child in order to adopt one. This program is called P.R.I.D.E. and it focuses on dealing with the emotional issues that could come up with raising an adopted child.
We have chosen to work with Children's Aid to adopt. Yes, to be honest, cost was a factor, but also, we were not really looking to have a newborn baby. At 37 I am past that point where my internal clock ticks for a bun in the oven. I am not really yearning to the 2 a.m. feedings. We would really love to have a little one but closer to between the ages of 1 and 4. There are so many little ones that are either removed from the home due to domestic problems or drug related or just incimpetance. It's unfortunate and non of us want to think about it but it happens, much more than we want to admit. Those children need homes jsut as much at the beautiful new babies that are so covetted. Our youngest son told us that he was happy to have a sister as long as she was a little sister and not a big sister. In other words, he wants to be the BIG brother. lol. so that put us at about 4 as our top number.
We have completed all our paperwork, seen our doctor, had our criminal checks done, accumulated our refrences, submitted all our information for approval and now, we wait. we wait until all our Refrences return their information and then, hopefully, our homestudy will begin. Another bump in our adoption highway. Well, the homestudy is a series of home visits and interviews with us, our sons and our family. The social worker will come to our home, talk with us and the kids to try to get to know us. They will check out the house, the sleeping arrangements, where we will put her, how she will be accepted. etc. I am not too worried about the homestudy, I know we are a good family and have plenty of room for her and plenty of love as well.
The one thing that worries me is our latest decision. we have decided to leave Kingston. Not necessarily go far, in fact, it will only be about 10 minutes outside city limits. It will be closer to pat's work and we really would love to have a nice , big, country property. Acreage is what we're looking for. Now, there was a bump in that sideroad too. We were informed that we can't move while the process in going on due to the fact that the town we wish to move to is just outside of the Kingston Juristiction. If we want to move now, we have to stop the process, move, then start again with the next juristiction over. We've come so far now that I really don't want to start over, it would be heartbreaking! so, we put our move on hold...for now. It's not out, just postponed till the homestudy process is complete. We'll see what they say about that later.
So now, we sait. Wait and hope that all will go well and time will pass quickly.
Bye for now blogland!
Rain Rain, go away!
It's Monday, AND it's raining, again! I'm crabby and whiny and really not in the mood for anything this day is throwing at me.
Already today I have had to give two time-outs, clean up a drink spill, deal with two kids that want absolutely NOTHING to do with listening to anything I have to say, and get a kid to school early for a field trip...in the rain.
On top of it all, I have a backache that is SCREAMING at me! sigh, yup, it's Monday.
The up side??? Hmmm, gotta think about that for a bit. Well, it's closer to June??? I don't know. Still haven't heard a thing from our social worker and our refrences have not yet reported any paperwork that came their way yet. Hopefully soon. It's tha waiting that is killing me. I know the process can take a long time, sometimes years but once we made the decision, we really wanted it to happen fast.
Definitely feeling a ho-hum day ahead. Really hoping that I wake up tomorrow feeling much more myself and Less CRABBY!
Already today I have had to give two time-outs, clean up a drink spill, deal with two kids that want absolutely NOTHING to do with listening to anything I have to say, and get a kid to school early for a field trip...in the rain.
On top of it all, I have a backache that is SCREAMING at me! sigh, yup, it's Monday.
The up side??? Hmmm, gotta think about that for a bit. Well, it's closer to June??? I don't know. Still haven't heard a thing from our social worker and our refrences have not yet reported any paperwork that came their way yet. Hopefully soon. It's tha waiting that is killing me. I know the process can take a long time, sometimes years but once we made the decision, we really wanted it to happen fast.
Definitely feeling a ho-hum day ahead. Really hoping that I wake up tomorrow feeling much more myself and Less CRABBY!
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